Mamas*Little*Treasures

Ruby for Women, August, 2011

Open publication - Free publishing - More crafts

Come on, Slowpoke!

“Yes, I understand that turning back or waiting for others
slows you down, but only at first.The deliberate extension of goodness, generosity, and wisdom always wins out in the end.”

~~ Lisa Bevere, “Lioness Arising: Wake Up and Change Your World”

When I was a little girl, riding my bike was one of the endless activities that filled my summer days. We lived by a lake, and our road was a dead-end, so most of the cars that drove by our house were either people who lived there or perhaps strangers who were lost. In any event, hardly anyone ever drove down that road fast . . . because there was a huge tree at the end of the road and you had to drive around that tree to turn around and go right back out the way you came in.

The other really great thing about "Our Road" was that there was a little hill just beyond our house (it seemed quite enormous to me at the time!) We would race down that hill to the bottom, and come screaming to a stop just before we would crash into an enormous Weeping Willow tree at the edge of a swampy area. Now THAT was a great way to spend a summer afternoon!

One day I was racing my bike with my BFF, and as we came zooming down that hill with the summer breeze whipping our hair into our eyes, we were laughing and yelling at one another to "Go faster! Go faster!." Suddenly I looked over and saw that she was RIGHT THERE and we slammed into each other. Of course, that knocked us both off of our bikes, right there in the middle of "Our Road," and there was blood everywhere. We both had skinned up our knees and our hands, knocked heads somewhere along the way, and we probably both had a fat lip. Fortunately, nothing was broken except our momentary dreams of being world-class bike racers, but it did put us out of commission for a few days. Not long, though!

Soon we were both back to the business of all the adventures that little girls would have on a summer day, playing in the woods, spying on the other neighborhood kids through the branches of that Weeping Willow tree, and racing our bikes down the hill again right there on "Our Road." That's the way life usually presents itself to us, both as children and as adults. One minute we are flying down the road of Life with our hair flying in the breeze, laughing as we go. And then, suddenly, we are confronted with "The Hill" of adversity, and frequently we crash and burn before we get back up and travel on.

So what happens when we have to "slow down" for someone else along the way? Sometimes my girls go for a bike ride here on "Our Road" by our house that is also near a lake with a woods in our backyard. But one of our girls can't go as fast as the other, because she has Cerebral Palsy. It is easy for her sister to get exasperated when they can't zoom down the road as fast as she would like . . . . so here's what we do: "How about you go as fast as you can until you get to the sign at the curve, and then come zooming back to catch up with your sister?" That way we all get to go for a bike ride, together, while one gets to experience the thrill of the wind-whipped hair in the eyes and mouth, while the other one gets the opportunity to learn how to make the bike pedals go around and not tip over, all at the same time!

Yes, it can slow us down when we have to wait for someone we love to catch up. But what's really important here? Convenience or compassion? The thrill of the speed or the joy of the relationship? In other areas of life, the question is the same: Do we value the relationship with our loved ones, or do we just want them to "hurry up" and do it our way? I think about how often God patiently waits for me to "get it," to understand, and to figure out that His way is always the only way on my life journey.

Do not be discouraged if you are waiting for a loved one - sometimes those moments of slowing down, taking a deep breath, and saying a little prayer is the task that is before you TODAY. No, you may not be setting the world on fire with the newest, greatest, and most incredible discovery, but you are giving a gift that is truly a treasure to those whom God has put in your pathway along the journey of Life, wherever you live on "Your Road."

If you would like to participate this week with "In Other Words," please leave a link here to your post on this quote so we can come visit you. We would love to read your thoughts on this topic! Also, you can find more information at Loni's blog, Writing Canvas, and join us in future weeks for "In Other Words."

 

 

Come on over and join the NEW BOOK CLUB at Katherine's Corner!

Here is a message from our Sweet Katie:

Most of you  know how much I enjoy reading. Not just your blogs, but books too. Every month I post a new book list. I started thinking last night ( while reading a book) about how much I used to enjoy Oprah’s book club. I miss her show. I do watch several programs on her OWN network though…..  So, today I am announcing Katherines Corner Book Club!

I realize a good book club takes time to build. But it can evolve into something wonderful.

A good book club needs : Members- You,

A good book- We’ll choose one together ( choices are listed below),

A meeting place- Here

A meeting time- Just once a month we’ll choose the book and you can leave comments on the book club page throughout the month.

It’s basically a no obligation book club. It’s sharing  your  thoughts through comments on the book club page throughout the month. What do you think?

We already have a common connection through Katherines Corner through our bloggy friendship so we’re off to a good start.

Leave your book choice ( from the selection below) in the comments section on this post and then just Join the book club members list on the book club page.

The book with the most votes is the book we will use for our first book club book. Starting next week! You can purchase your book through my book shop Click HERE Or just go to the book list page here at Katherines Corner or from your local book seller when all the votes are in.

One Summer  by David Baldacci -

Terminally ill Jack is determined to get his fractured family back together.

 

 

 

Maine by J. Courtney Sullivan -

Three generations of women explore the complicated and often contradictory aspects of friendship.

 

 

 

 

 Robopocalypse  by Daniel Wilson

A daughter's “smart” doll knows to much. The world technology has evolved in this science fiction novel.

 

 

 

 

 Lets Take The Long Way Home By Gail Caldwell -

A celebration of life and friendship.

 

 

 

 

Lets keep inviting people. You can post the book club button on your sidebar, or blog about it, etc. This is the button code

<a href=”http://katherinescorner.com/book-list/book-club-at-katherines-corner” target=”_blank”><img src=”http://i51.tinypic.com/v8ipnn.jpg” border=”0″ alt=”Katherines Corner book club”></a>

Hopefully we will always have a core group, and together we will make the Katherines Corner book club a fun and interesting experience.

 

I Don't Know About You . . . .

If you’ve ever traveled to other countries, I’m sure it has occurred to you just how fortunate we are to live in America. Now, that is not a statement of arrogance or false pride . . . it is simply an observation. I have only traveled to a few other countries, and as a “country girl,” haven’t even traveled to very many of the larger metropolitan areas of our own country.

It is not difficult, however, at least to be aware of all of the poverty, despair, hopelessness, and violence that abound all around the world, even here in America. In an age of instant information, we are so frequently bombarded with images of violence and tragedy, that it is easy to become complacent.

Having witnessed first-hand a bit of the devastation and despair that is a daily part of life for many people around the world, it certainly seems to me that, of all the places I could possibly live, America is by far the best place of all!

In America, we at least have opportunities to create our own destiny. Having grown up in a small, rural community in mid-Michigan, it never occurred to me that we were “poor.” I didn’t realize just how little we really had in the way of material possessions until I went away to college and met other students from wealthy families. It was overwhelming, at times, to realize what it must have been like to grow up having a huge, gorgeous house, beautiful clothing, and parents who drove expensive cars. That was a lesson in economics!

My observations about America do not come from a position of wealth and privilege. I worked for a few years for our country court system where I was the Education Director for a program for people who had been incarcerated to complete their education. During those years I worked with students who were third-generation drug addicts; I worked with a young couple who had lost their children as a result of an explosion in their little hovel of a home while they were cooking Meth.

 Some of my students were in their mid-forties and fifties, and all they had known was a life of hopelessness and violence. One of my students eventually took his own life because of the abuse he was experiencing, and he didn’t tell anyone about it until it was too late.

For me, there is no wistful, unrealistic vision of America as a place that is perfect and everyone is happy, healthy, and safe. This is a country filled with ordinary people, but because of our history, we have opportunities to accomplish extraordinary things. I pray that we do not lose those opportunities because we choose to look the other way, or because we only focus on the imperfections we see all around us.

I don’t know about you . . . . but I believe America is still the best country on earth. God has blessed this country, in spite of our failures and mistakes, because our foundation is built on God's truth. This Independence Day, I choose to thank God for the opportunity to live in a country where I am free to live my life according to the beliefs that I hold.

God bless America!

Time Always Tells the Truth

 

"Only when we understand that God has ordained our suffering can we begin to make sense of it. Only then can we be certain that He has a purpose in it. When tragedy comes, when adversity strikes, we will not be shaken. Yes, we will cry. Yes, we will grieve. But we will move on confidently knowing that God is on His throne, that we are in His hand, that our circumstances are His doing, and that He is working them for our good."

~~ Terry L. Johnson,   When Grace Comes Home

 

Time. For many of us, time feels like the "enemy." We don't want to wait, to be patient, to trust that our immediate circumstances will be used by God to create something far more beautiful than we could have imagined. It all seems so senseless when we are in the midst of crisis, when everything around us appears to be broken beyond repair. The clouds of confusion make it very difficult to comprehend that God is still there, and that He has a plan and a purpose for our suffering.

 

But I have learned over the years, and through many heartbreaking circumstances, that "time always tells the truth." Eventually we will see the plan, the purpose, and the reason for our suffering. Now, that is not to say that God makes us suffer through agonizing, dream-shattering events in life just to make His point . . . . but He uses the circumstances of our lives, both the joys and the heart aches, to create something that never could have been possible without those moments of darkness. Here's a story to express this truth:

 

When she discovered that her family was falling apart, she had to decide whether it was the "right" choice or the "wrong" choice to address the infidelity. And because the children were still small, she decided that the "right" choice was to remain silent, protect the children, and try to "fix" her marriage. So she did. For 25 years. All of those years the marriage continued to be violated by infidelity, but she was determined that her children would have a "normal" childhood. And they did. Kind of.

 

She thought she had made the "right" choice, but discovered later that her silence and all of her efforts to "fix" herself, "fix" her marriage, and "fix" her family made no difference in the ongoing secret life of her husband. And it turned out NOT to be a good choice for her children, because they were completely stunned when she finally broke. After 25 years the marriage finally came to a disastrous end, with much brokenness for the entire family . . . . well, except for the one who had perpetuated the pretense in the first place.

 

Through the years of deception, blaming, accusations, and lies she wondered when  . . . . . how . . . . if God could use all that brokenness to make something beautiful. Sin is sin, and there are consequences for sin. But there is also forgiveness, mercy, and grace. And over time, the truth began to be revealed, and eventually she saw how all those years of heartache, shattered dreams, and a broken heart turned into another story. A story of hope, of redemption, or restoration, and of beauty.

 

For out of those years of secrecy, pretense, and pain God brought a new relationship that is safe and trusting. And God also brought two little girls from China to live with their "Forever Family" in America where they will be treated with respect and dignity. They will be allowed to have an education, and they will be allowed to be loved. Instead of being tossed to the side of the road in a rural Chinese village, God had His hand on two precious children who now have the opportunity to be part of a family. Instead of being left alone in the "dying room" of a Chinese orphanage, they are now wrapped in the warm embrace of their church family. That might not have happened if she hadn't been willing to walk through that time of darkness in her heart and soul. But it takes time. So, be patient, because "time always tells the truth."

 

If you would like to join us this week for "In Other Words," please visit our hostess this week, Jennifer at Scraps and Snippets, where you will find links to the other IOW participants and where you can leave your link so we can visit you to read your thoughts on this quote. Have a great Tuesday - and never, ever give up hope!  Hugs, Nina

 

 

You can still join Team Ruby for Operation Pillowcase

The last time I checked, Operation Pillowcase was working on the next batch of over 1,000 pillowcases to send to our troops in Afghanistan. So, I pulled out all of my patriotic-themed fabric (and a couple of other gender-neutral prints) and got started making a few pillowcases to send along to Debra Spincic. Debra is organizing a group of teams from across the country, and she keeps us up-to-date on the progress or reaching the current goal on her blog at Operation Pillowcase.

Well . . . . as soon as I got started on THAT project, my computer started acting up and there I was for about two weeks struggling with getting my other work done using the lap top. Which makes me crazy because I'm not used to it, and all of my "stuff" was on my regular computer. So, the pillowcase project sat on the ironing board for a couple of weeks before I thought of a solution to getting BOTH projects finished. My sweet mother-in-law has been a professional seamstress for most of her adult life. She was the manager of a bridal shop before she retired, and since that time she always has sewing projects to do for friends and neighbors . . . . and friends of friends and neighbors of neighbors.

I called her up and just ran the idea by her of taking the fabric that I already had and did she have time to whip up a few pillowcases? Well, of course she was delighted for the opportunity, especially because she has three grandsons who are in the military. She always amazes me, because when I decide to do a project like this I have to figure out when it will fit into my schedule of all things related to being a mama of two little girls, as well as working it into my writing and editing schedule. But I believe these kinds of projects are important, so I always think that I will, some how, fit it in between this or that. But with Grandma, I gave her the fabric on a Saturday and she had them finished by Tuesday.

I think I'll pull out some more fabric from my stash and send it on to Grandma so she can make up another batch of pillowcases! So, I'm just sayin' . . . . even if YOU don't have the time to make up a few pillowcases for our troops, perhaps you know someone who does have the time. Some grandmas are the kind who are looking for something like this to do. But then there are other grandmas (like me!) who already have more than enough projects to last for a lifetime. So wherever you are in life, see if this isn't a project that will either fit into your schedule or into the life of someone you love. Because doing something like this could be just what the dr. ordered! Please leave me a comment if you want to join Team Ruby and I'll put you on the list and send you my mailing address so you can send your pillowcases to me. I'll forward them on to Debra where they will be sent to Afghanistan. Thanks for caring!

In Other Words: Touching the Heart of the World

"He who can reach a child’s heart can reach the world’s heart."
~ Rudyard Kipling

So . . . . what would you do?  Have you ever been face to face with a child that is wounded, broken, alone, and frightened?  Did those missionaries in Haiti do the wrong thing . . . . or the right thing?  What would you do if you were in Haiti, watching the chaos, terror, hunger, and exposure traumatize these small children?  I guess I don't know what the answer is.  I do know, however, that I have looked into the face of a tiny girl in a Chinese orphanage, as she stared past me with empty eyes that seemed to know only neglect. 

Her vacant eyes eventually made contact with mine, at the sound of my voice, and one little tear escaped and slid down her grimy cheek.  Her thin, matted hair made a crooked, wispy little crown around her angel face . . . . but her tears mixed with the dirt on her face, and her runny nose, all told a much grimmer story.  Should I have picked her up and brought her home with me?  Well, I would have, if I could have.  But we were in China to bring our second daughter home, and we were told that we were only allowed to adopt one child at a time.  Another trip, another year, another king's ransom to the Chinese government for the privilege of adopting one of the baby girls in their orphanages.  And we were told there would be absolutely no possibility of returning for that particular little girl. 

As I reached out and touched her cheek, she began to sob.  Silently.  Strapped onto the potty chair, with several other babies in the room, she just sat there and stared at me with her tiny tears dripping from her cheeks and chin.  And then my husband touched my arm.  "They are watching you," he said as he subtly moved his head in the direction of the orphanage director and the village authorities.  "I think you better come out of here," he said as he pulled me to a standing position.  I looked back into those dark eyes, felt the tug of a mother's heart, and desperately wished that there was some way, any way, to scoop her up and bring her home with us.  I felt my husband's strong hand holding my arm and leading me away from the baby room, and I willed myself not to look back again.  But that face haunts me yet.  What could I do?  What SHOULD I have done? 

I have done what has been put in front of me to do . . . . . but I so wish I could have done more, especially on that day as we drove away from that Chinese orphanage.  Yes, we have two beautiful daughters who are the love of our lives.  But there are so many more.  And what about the babies in Haiti?  Do you have an answer?  Because I would like to know, and I definitely do not know what is the right thing to do in Haiti.  Our hearts always cling to the belief that we will choose to do the right thing.  But what should you do when you can't figure out what the "right thing" is in a  particular situation?  I know . . . . we should always obey the law.  But what about in a situation where there appears to be no law, no authorities, no semblance of governmental order and structure.  How would we even KNOW what to do in a situation like the chaos in Haiti? 

But all of this confusion will never change the truth and reality that those who are given the privilege of touching the heart of a child, does indeed, have the opportunity to touch the heart of the world.  Whatever comes of this very sad and unfortunate situation in Haiti, I choose to believe that these missionaries were doing what they thought was the right thing for the children.  But then perhaps you've never been in a situation where you made a choice that you sincerely believed was exactly what God would have you to do . . . .only to discover later that, although your intentions were absolutely noble, you had accidentally taken a wrong turn on the pathway of life.  Happens to the best of us. 

Please take a minute to visit the other IOW participants this week, and maybe even invite a few friends to join us.  And if you have a blog, post your thoughts on this quotation this week and then come back and leave a link to your post so we can come and visit you. 

But do you really mean it?

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."    ~ John F. Kennedy   Actions really DO speak louder than our words.   Yet even those who are devoted and committed to living a life of integrity frequently "miss the mark."  That's because we are not perfect, and as regular human beings, we will continue to make mistakes, stumble and fall, and take a tumble along life's journey.  So, in thinking about the quote for today, I am reminded that, although we may not ever get it all down just exactly right, we still need to do our best every day to see that our actions match up pretty closely with our words.  It is really easy in some communities to use our religion as a "mask" for the deep, dark, hidden places in our souls.  That never works out well, for anyone, including the person who is hiding behind those "perfect" words.    As we approach this season of Thanksgiving, we are all reminded of the blessings we experience in our every-day lives.  Some years we feel that we have more to be thankful for than in other years, but when we think about it honestly, we all have much for which to be grateful.  But then, how often do we turn right around and live as if we are paupers?  Sure, many of us are struggling with the day-to-day necessities of life, finding it difficult to pay all of the bills and still be able to buy groceries.  And that is not easy.  How can we continually act grateful when we can't find money to put gas in the car, or for the kids' school lunches, or to buy baby formula?  I'm not sure I know the answer . . . . but this one thing I DO know:  getting angry, sad, frustrated, or resentful won't change a thing!    Well, except it will just make you miserable   ;o)   There have been many times in my life, and I'm sure in your life as well, when it seemed impossible to figure out how to get from "here" to "there."  No matter which way we looked, there was no way "out."  So . . . . . we have a couple of choices at that point.  We can allow our natural anger and frustration to continue to move us in the direction of bitterness, or we can recognize that holding on to all of that anxiety will only make the situation worse, and make us feel completely miserable.  Then we get the opportunity to sort out the yucky stuff from the blessings, and move forward to discover a solution, or a possible alternative, or even a place of peace in the midst of the uncertainty and sadness.  Is it easy?  Of course not, but then we know that life is NOT going to be easy, so let's get on with it!   As we face every day, we can put on the "mask" of propriety, saying all the right words and pretending to be whatever it is that we think we are expected to be . . . . but at the end of our day, at the end of our life, the real question will be whether or not we truly lived a life of gratitude, honor, and integrity.  And it will no longer matter what "everyone else" thinks, or that you were able to convince "everyone else" that you were something that you were not.  It will only matter that you gave your complete devotion to honoring God with your actions, not just your words, even if you mess up once in a while.  And living a life of trust and joy, even in the midst of darkness and confusion is one way for our actions to reflect our words.    Today, many of us are not feeling that this is the best Thanksgiving we have ever had . . . . . but how about we choose to act on what we know, being grateful for our blessings, and open our hearts and minds to the gifts that God has prepared for us this holiday season.  Who knows, we might just discover that He has provided a way for us to move beyond the difficulties of today, and lead us to a brighter tomorrow.  Have a blessed Thanksgiving, and I pray that you will always remember all that He has for you, no matter what!   Please visit Tami at "The Next Step" to find all of the other IOW participants this week, and then take a minute to visit them on this beautiful Tuesday!   

My philosophy of "Old Stuff"

I've always known (kind of) about the Chinese culture, which holds great reverence for their ancestors and elderly relatives.  So much so, that sons of Chinese families, traditionally, care for their aging parents, while daughters typically marry into another family and help care for the aging parents of their husbands.  With this tradition in mind, I think often of my own daughters and what their lives would be like if they had remained in China.  I am not suggesting that this Chinese tradition is not as good as our American traditions . . . . far from it!  If our elderly relatives were treated with the same level of respect as is shown to the "senior citizens" of China, well we just might be having a different kind of discussion about health care, nursing homes, and the "sandwich generation." 

So there is definitely something to be said in favor of the social and cultural value that is placed on older people in China.  Of course the other side of that observation is that, when this tradition is followed closely, it severely limits options for the women of that country.  On the other hand, sometimes all of the "opportunities" that are available to American young people are not always safe, healthy, or wise.  But that is another discussion . . . . . all of this got me to thinking (again) about how we, as Americans, have for so long been pursuing the dream of having it all. 

And the problems that it has created for people who have been fortunate to have ALMOST all (of whatever they are seeking), and now are faced with the reality of a struggling economy.  Many of us simply can no longer spend our Saturday afternoons wandering around in a huge mall, with cheery music tempting us to feel all warm and fuzzy as we rack up those $$$$ on our charge cards.  We can always pay it off later!  Unfortunately, "later" has caught up with us, and it is not much fun for many Americans. 

My girls will often ask me, "Mom, did you have M&Ms when you were a kid?" or "Was there TV around when you were a kid?" or other equally wise observations from their perspective.  And I will tell them the truth . . . . . yep, those things "were around" but I didn't have nearly as much of it as they do.  And I lived to tell about it!  For some people, that overwhelming desire to have more stuff, new stuff, expensive stuff, and beautiful stuff becomes almost like a noose around the neck.  It becomes all-consuming, to the point of destroying marriages and forcing people into bankruptcy. 

Now, all of us have faced financial struggles at some point in our lives . . . . . and some end up needing to file bankruptcy for very legitimate reasons.  That is not the point of this thought process.  It is about the mindless consumption of material goods that has become such an accepted part of the "American Dream."  So, when I chatted with one of my older daughters about how difficult it is to keep going when there is just never enough money to go around, we came to the conclusion that there are millions of people right now who are actually in more difficult circumstances than we are encountering, and that there are also millions of Americans who lived through the Great Depression . . . . . and they survived.  Not only did they survive, many became stronger, more independent, more resourceful, and more joyful directly in proportion to their determination to be thankful for what they had.  No matter how simple, they learned to appreciate the little things in life. 

So, when one of our nieces posted a comment on my FB page about my ability to take "old stuff" and make it into something kind of cool (or something like that!), it reminded me of a conversation I had with my mother-in-law over 30 years ago.  Even back then, she made the observation that I "could make a beautiful home out of just about nothing."  My philosophy all of my life has been, a coat of paint doesn't cost much and it will make a whole room feel brand-new!  As I carry that philosophy of "old stuff" over into my daily life, I am continually confronted with the ways in which we so often just "throw away" things that are no longer brand-new (well, actually some of it IS brand-new, as evidenced by the number of gorgeous items I find in thrift shops that still have the tags attached!) - but we've grown tired of it, or it is no longer the "latest fashion." 

And that attitude carries over into our lives as we encounter people . . . . those who are older, or a bit slower, or perhaps can't "snap it up" to our level of expectation.  I see it frequently when we are out with our daughter, Missy Stubborn-Pants.  She WILL do it herself, even when it takes her a bit longer than most other kids because of her CP.  Stubborn in that case is a good thing (of course, it sometimes makes me crazy, like when it is time for school and she somehow thinks that just because she is determined to zip her own coat, that will change what time the bell rings!).  Anyway, I've been thinking about "old stuff," perhaps more so because I just had a birthday last week   ;o)  but I've recognized that one of the reasons that I love vintage stuff, and fixing up "old stuff" so much is because I see so much waste in our society. 

 I think it is time for us all to re-think our own "philosophy of old stuff" and begin to get a bit more comfortable with the treasures that can be discovered in all things "vintage."  Including Grandma and Grandpa!   Have a blessed Monday!  I'm off to the studio to fix up some more "old stuff" because it seems that there are at least a few folks out there in the world who like my style! 

Please visit my little Etsy shop at www.gossamerwingsstudio.etsy.com to see more of my "old stuff" that I have turned into beautiful "new stuff" - you won't be disappointed!    

For this I am thankful

Sunday morning .   . . . a peaceful, quiet, introspective time when we can take a few moments and revisit the past week and make plans for the days ahead. This week we celebrate Thanksgiving. I am again reminded to focus on what we have and not on what we wish we had. We are all struggling through times of uncertainty and confusion, many of us facing financial difficulties which seem to loom so much larger as we approach the holidays. But just remember . . . . all of those things are events in life, they are not the reason for life and they are certainly not the really important things in life. Family, friendships, community, and most importantly, knowing our place in the universe. So, whether you believe in a loving Heavenly Father who cares for you deeply . ... or not . . . . you are loved and treasured, just for being YOU! And it's no big deal that you aren't perfect - neither is anyone else. It's not about being perfect, it is about receiving the loving relationship that is available to you through the sacrifice of the Lord Jesus. It is a gift, all you need to do is accept it. Is it real? Is it true? Well, just because something hasn't happened to YOU does not mean it didn't happen! Have a blessed Sunday, and let's start our week of Thanksgiving with a grateful heart.