Mamas*Little*Treasures

Broken Pieces of Your Soul

“For most of this century we have wrongly defined soul wounds as psychological disorders and delegated their treatment to trained specialists. Damaged psyches aren’t the problem. The problem is disconnected souls. ”

by Larry Crabb
Connecting:
Healing Ourselves and Our Relationships

Have you ever wondered why you are where you are, and what in the world is the point?  In his book, The Purpose Driven Life, Rick Warren has helped millions of seeking souls to recognize some of their personal, spiritual goals as they strive in practical ways to find their path in life.  The very popularity of this book over the past several years gives ample evidence that people are longing for guidance, for direction, and for a sense of meaning to this physical, temporal, fleeting existence here on earth.  And when we can't seem to find our way, when we wander around aimlessly searching for "the meaning of life," it is no wonder our society seems so broken.  So many people find themselves with shattered dreams, broken hopes and hearts, and eventually consumed with frustration and anger. 

Even in the midst of the busy, busy, busy lifestyle that has become so typical of Americans, we just can't seem to drown out the echo of our souls searching for meaning.  In my own life, for so many years, I was consumed with raising a family, ministry in my church, volunteer work in my community . . . . but I was alone.  Now, most of the time I was grateful for a few moments of "quiet, alone time."  But that is different than being surrounded by people, noise, and activity and STILL being alone.  I wasn't lonely, because I didn't have the time or the silence to even contemplate all of that - but deep within my soul, I was ALONE.  Through many years of heartache, turmoil, loss, grief, and frustration, I have managed to discover a place where I am at peace, and now I am no longer alone.  But it was not easy finding my way here. 

When we think of "soul wounds," we often contemplate issues such as abuse, abandonment, disillusionment, neglect, and heartbreak.  And those kinds of experiences definitely create wounded souls.  But I think it is in the deeper, more intimate places of our souls where the wound grows.  When you consider the source of all of these kinds of heartache, the foundational problem is, as Larry Crabb, asserts: our "disconnected souls."  Our aloneness.  Because when we are broken, or wounded, that can be a temporary struggle.  It only becomes a life-long tragedy when we carry our "wounded souls" silently within, and have no one else to help carry the burden. 

Too often we focus on the "event," and not the causes of the various events in our lives that have wounded us.  Have you ever thought about WHY this person or that person hurt you or abandoned you or abused you?  There is never an excuse for wrong behavior, but there usually is a REASON people behave as they do.  Have you ever wounded someone in your life, not because you intended to hurt them, but because, in your own anger or frustration or pain, you simply said or did something that was hurtful to someone else?  Of course you have, because we all have done things that are less than "perfect" because we are human.  We make mistakes, and so will everyone else in our lives.  Forgiveness is the key to this particular situation, but thinking about "wounded souls" brings us back to the question of just HOW did we all get here?  And what should we do about our own "wounded soul"? 

The words of encouragement in today's quote suggest that it is not in "getting even" with the ones who have wounded us, but it is in discovering a way to re-connect with others who will nurture, support, encourage, mentor, and guide us . . . . or even carry us, when we need to be held tightly for a while.  We must be wise - be careful of those who would wound us again - but remember that there really are people in our world who are safe, who are honest, who are trustworthy.  If you but look for them, God will guide you to the "safe people" in your world.  Disconnected souls will be wounded souls.  Reconnect and be loved, and the wounds will become a memory that will spur you on to be one of the "safe people" for someone else.  Life truly is a circle . . . . come on back home!

Stop by and visit Esthermay at her blog The Heart of a Pastor's Wife, and then take a minute to visit all of the other women who are participating this week In Other Words. 

 

 

Making the Most of Monday: A Vintage Vision

l almost didn't take the time to post today . . . . it's Monday, and you know how Mondays are!  But I decided that I just HAVE to get going again on some of the things in life that I LOVE, but haven't taken much time for lately.  The more I discover about the online vintage community, and connect with new people every week, the more inspired I am to continue on this journey.  And, especially with everyone so concerned about the economy, I am constantly reminded of how important it is to embrace tried and true, "old-fashioned" values to get us through these difficult times.  I'm beginning to consciously develop what I like to calll my "Vintage Vision."  Now, that simply means that I am refocusing my energy in areas that have been a priority all of my life, but in the past few years I have kind of gotten away from some of the really important aspects of life, as a result of all of the pressure and stress to pursue some good, even profitable, projects . . . . but they aren't really where my heart is.  Every day I awaken to new ideas, new visions, new commitment to what really matters in life - those are the things that fill my vintage vision.  Here is a list of some of the ideas, concepts, values that I'm working on these days:

1.   My relationship with God - nothing else really matters to me if this isn't in first place!

2.   Family - the very most important aspect of life here in our earthly experience.

3.   Relationships with friends and in all of my communities - we are never alone if we reach out and connect with all of the wonderful people out here who are just waiting to take our hand and walk for a while along the same path.

4.   Honesty, integrity, and hard work - all of our striving will eventually fade away unless we are constantly motivated by a spirit of honesty and integrity, and of course, nothing in life is worth having, being, or doing unless you do it with your best effort. 

My mama always used to tell me, "First you work, and THEN you play!"  Maybe that's because we seldom had much in the way of possessions, but we definitely learned to work hard for everything we had!

5.  Remember and honor the gifts that are ours because we live in a land of freedom - bought with the blood and sacrifice of millions of men and women who have willingly given of themselves to keep us free.  Always remember!

And so, in my quest to renew a Vintage Vision, I carry on, determined to use each day, each hour, and all of my energy to become all that God has for me, and to do all that I can for my family, my community, and my country . . . . . all while pursuing my love of all things vintage!  Here are a few of the vintage items in my Etsy shop, with lots more on the way.  Also, I have been wandering around the vintage blogosphere, and I'll be posting items from shops all over so you can find them, too! 

Friday Flea Market - sounds like fun to me!

 

Short and sweet this morning, as Grandma and Grandpa will be visiting for the next couple of days on their way home from Florida . . . . . but I just have to share another of my latest discoveries on my vintage journey!  Through Vintage Indie, I found my way to Friday Flea Market, and I'm so excited to connect with another community of friends who love all things vintage.  If you love vintage, too, be sure to stop by and visit all the sweet little shops at Friday Flea Market.  In the midst of the craziness that is LIFE, I finally had time to work on a couple of my reconstruction projects and they are now listed in my Etsy shop - and I'm looking forward to getting set up with a shop at Friday Flea Market.  So many wonderful vintage treasures - and it reminds me of my commitment to focus on "vintage values" in my life, and to build the old-fashioned, time-honored values into the lives of my daughters . . . . honesty, hard work, community, and integrity.  Gotta run, but I'll be back with more vintage discoveries tomorrow!  Nina

Yesterday I met this lady . . . . .

 "To ease another's heartache is to forget one's own."  

by Abraham Lincoln

. . . . who, for some reason, felt comfortable sharing with me her recent heartaches.  I was at work, in a bank, and she just came in to pay her mortgage.  Since we are refinancing lots of mortgages right now, with the interest rates dropping so low, I just asked her what her current interest rate is, so that perhaps we could help her out a bit, if we could get her a lower rate. 

Suddenly, her eyes filled up with tears, and she began to share with me how she ended up in her current situation . . . . marriage of 25 years falling apart, husband going through "mid-life crisis," loss of job, home repairs that need to be taken care of, financially struggling just to make the mortgage payment each month.  So, I listened.  And I listened.  Fortunately, I had the time to be able to give her my full attention.  And she talked and talked. 

As she shared with me her story, it suddenly occurred to me that my own stress and anxiety over financial issues and physical exhaustion seemed rather manageable.  Not that my concerns are not still very real and still very important, but her story put it all into perspective for me, and allowed me to focus on HER pain instead of my own daily frustrations. 

After about twenty or thirty minutes of conversation, she reached across my desk and took my hand.  She said, "I knew God brought me in here today!"  And she walked away, headed off to her job at the post office, with a smile on her face and a promise to come back next week to see about that mortgage refi.  All I did was listen!  And I just keep asking God why I'm working in a bank, when what I REALLY want to be doing is working at home.  Maybe I am here for just a time as this.  Who knows?

Wherever you are TODAY, you can be a blessing and a gift in the life of someone else.  Whether it might be in the secret little joys that you bring to your children, or your husband, or your parents, or other family members, or in the wider world of church, community, school, and yes, even in the noise and chaos of the business world . . . . . God can and will use YOU to hold someone else who is struggling.  And . . . . if YOU need to be held, know that God has someone out there just waiting to take your hand. 

 

 

 

Vintage Indie, where free spirits reside

I recently discovered Vintage Indie, a community blog where lovers of vintage "stuff" can come together and find each other.  I know that there are lots of other places for artists and designers can congregate, but since MY love is to create new stuff from old stuff, I think this might be a good place for me!  In her post, "Making the Most of Monday: Sewing Seeds," Gabreial opens her heart to all her new "vingtage" friends.  She says, "I would like to encourage you to sew "seeds", I'm not talking about literal seeds, I'm talking about seeds of good things."    Now this sounds like a girl I could like! 

Its time for mamas*Iittle*treasures to find the courage and the time to just be brave, and jump into the things that I love!  I've been so overwhelmed for the past many months to really have the time, the energy, the interest, or the motivation to step out of my comfort zone and reach out to the community of artists / creators / moms that I know are out here.  I know, too, that because of my absence, I've lost many of my previous online connections.  That is NOT working for me!

So, here's to moving forward, while maintaining what Gabreial calls a "vintage perspective" on life!  Vintage Indie . . . . check it out, be encouraged, and if you have some of the same ideas, questions, concerns, and determination to make the most of everyday, stop by and visit Gabreial at Vintage Indie.  I might just see you there!  Nina  

PS here's a sweet ivory spring sweater that I discovered a couple of weeks ago, and decided to add a little embellishment with some ruffles and vintage buttons.  Thanks for the inspiration, Vintage Indie!

Three Ideas for Unblocking your Creativity (and fitting it all into your crazy schedule!)

Do you ever find yourself just wandering around your house, or your yard, or your garden, or your sewing room, or studio, or craft room . . . . . totally clueless as to what it is you should be doing next?  I think that's sometimes called "writer's block," but in my case it encompasses so much more than being "stuck" with a blank brain when it comes to my writing projects.  One aspect of being "stuck" while trying to make the next move is oftentimes that we have too many choices, and too many projects.  It seems impossible to decide which direction to go in, and which task to tackle first.  Since I've been struggling with this mental / creative block for quite some time, I've decided to try to figure out why I'm having such a hard time moving forward.  Maybe my discoveries can help someone else who is wandering in a creative wilderness . . . . or maybe someone out there can help me figure out where I lost myself!

So, even if no one else ever reads what I'm writing here, perhaps it will at least help me get a bit of focus, motivation, and direction for all of the junk that just keeps bouncing around in my brain.  I've always heard that the best way to eat an elephant is just one bite at a time - and a journey of 1,000 miles starts with the first step.  I guess I had better start eating . . . . or walking . . . . or whatever it is going to take to get me moving!  Here are just a few ideas that come to mind to get myself creating again:

1.  MAKE A LIST OF IDEAS:  I know that seems rather simple, and for many creative types, list-making is the LAST thing they want to do!  But for me it really is a good place to start.  Because I am so overwhelmed by my ideas, I become paralyzed.  Should I work on this writing project, or that sewing project, or that craft project?  And what is stopping me from just doing SOMETHING????  OK, for the next week, here is my first list:

 *  Finish two eBook patterns (that have been neglected since before Christmas)

 *  Organize my studio so I can find all of my supplies

 *  Create ONE reconstructed garment from vintage fabrics/buttons/embellishments

 *  Organize supplies / photos for ONE scrapbook page

2.  DO JUST ONE THING DIFFERENT EACH DAY:  That's kind of like not dieting!  Instead of "dieting," I've decided to do just ONE thing different today.  For instance, I'm trying to minimize eating foods with sugar.  That's not too difficult, and I feel so much better when I avoid too much sugar.  Or, I'm trying to get up just 15 minutes earlier in the morning, and stay up 15 minutes later at night.  That isn't so easy for me . . . . by the time I get the girls in bed, I'm usually exhausted.  But just 15 minutes - I might be able to do that.  So, tomorrow I'm going to try to work on my eBook patterns for just 15 - 30 minutes.  That's the goal, and it is manageable.  We'll see!

3.  SET THE TIMER - for yourself and for your family:  If they know that you'll help them with their homework, or pick up the toys, or read to them in, say, 20 minutes, perhaps they will be less determined to make you crazy!   I'm not sure if this will work or not, but it's worth a try.  Just give yourself 20 minutes or so to tidy up your studio, or gather up your craft supplies, or lay out that pattern.  It's a start.  And when the timer goes off, move on to the next thing.  Do you think we can train our families to manage for just a few minutes without our presence?  It's a place to begin to give ourselves some space for our own interests, teach our children and husbands that we need a bit of personal time, and take care of our own needs - after all, I'm much better with them when I've had a little bit of time to think my own thoughts. 

I'm on an adventure here, to see if I can rediscover my creative self.  Maybe I'll even find the time and motivation to post my progress here, and perhaps discover a few new friends along the way who want to join me on this creative journey.  I'll keep you posted!

 

What should we do?

Well, here we are, all of us, in the midst of a recession . . . . or is it actually a real depression yet?  Who knows - I guess it depends on who you're talking to and what the definition is.  All I know (about this particular subject) is that we are struggling financially, and just about everyone else that we know is struggling, too.  Whatever that makes the state of our economy, here we are.  So, I've been thinking.  So what else is new?  I usually think too much and make myself crazy.  And then there are those around me who have to put up with my "too much thinking," and I really make THEM crazy!  How can I do something, create something, write something that will help a few other folks out there who are struggling through this mess along with the rest of us?  Since I've been working away from home (while I'd really rather be working right here in my cozy little lake cottage), I haven't really had much time to work on my creative stuff, and that is making me crazier than normal    ;o)   I must get back to the creative, artsy stuff one way or another. 

I guess it hasn't helped that we've had two weddings since we moved to the lake in the fall . . . . and then, of course, there were all of the holidays, and birthdays, and then there is school, and work, and church.  So, somewhere in the middle of all of this stuff called "LIFE," I have to find a little bit of time to get all of this junk that I just think about, out of my head and into action!  So, here's one of my ideas:  Since I've done lots and lots of projects where I take OLD stuff and turn it into some NEW stuff, maybe there are other moms and dads who want to try some deconstruction / reconstruction projects for their families.  If I can squeeze out a little bit of time every few days, or even once a week, I want to begin documenting some of these ideas to share with you.  I'm still getting emails about my eBooks and patterns, so I know you all are still making stuff.  But what do we need to make these days?  Clothing for our kids . . . . . or for our own use . . . . or home decor projects . . . . or practical little projects for our yard and garden?  Here are a few pix of some of the vintage and retro garments that I am currently working on.  How can I transform them?  Maybe add some embellishments, cut them apart and add a little skirt . . . . some vintage jewels or a few fabric flowers?  I'm thinking . . . . .

When I was a little girl, my mama often would take hand-me-down clothing in adult sizes, cut it apart and recreate something for me to wear.  Dresses, especially (back when little girls wore dresses to school most of the time), but she also made my winter coats sometimes.  That's why I learned to sew at such an early age . . . . in self-defense!  When I became a teen-ager, if I wanted something new, I would have to babysit for a few hours, buy a couple of yards of fabric, thread, and a pattern and make a new outfit.  So, now I LOVE to create new designs and beautiful clothing for children (my own girls are just as happy with a raggy pair of jeans and a t-shirt, though), but I REALLY enjoy the challenge of taking something old and making it into something new.  As I am able to make slow, but hopefully consistent, progress on some of these projects, I think I will try to take a few pictures and write up some tutorials and eBooks just in case some other families want to try their hand at reconstructing and recreating whatever they might need.  After all, it doesn't take much looking around to know that the world is overflowing with STUFF . . . . . so maybe using up some of that STUFF to make different STUFF is just plain common sense.  And if you are interested in being eco-friendly, well that works, too! 

Just have to post a few pictures of our sweet little Leah . . . . she is just about 4 months old.  Since she is in Colorado with her mommy and daddy and big  brother Jacob, it will be a while before we will get to see her again, so I took these pictures to keep her close to our hearts!